Fear Affects Obedience…

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       This weekend was hard and I’m glad i decided to take the weekend off of blogging. Discovered some things that really hurt and felt vulnerable in other areas and i let it ruin my sunday. Also coming down with a cold. No fun! I almost felt like not blogging today too…but I need to for me.  Right there is an example of how fear can affect obedience…if i hadn’t grabbed my laptop then i would’ve let my fears win.

      Today’s blog I’m going to take a bit of a different direction. Instead of doing a phrase by phrase break down i’m just going to list the verse and post my thoughts and may add some of what the lady from the devotional wrote and leave it at that.  Here we go….

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“And she made this vow: “O Lord of Heaven’s Armies, if you will look upon my sorrow and answer my prayer and give me a son, then I will give him back to you. He will be yours for his entire lifetime, and as a sign that he has been dedicated to the Lord, his hair will never be cut.”      1 Samuel 1:11

        To give a little back story on what the devotional was about… The writer gave a wonderful story about her son and wanting to become a Missionary and had dedicated her kids to the Lord when they were younger, but when it came time for them to follow their hearts to go out in the “field” it was hard to follow through and let them go. In doing so she showed that not only was she not obedient to God but she passed that on to her kids. It all worked out in the end, but it was something to think about.

        When i look at this verse i not only see the part of letting go of our kids but i see also the part where we want something so bad: a friend, a good job, a new home, and so on…that we say to God “if you grant me this I’ll….!” How many times do we do this? How many times do we then follow through with our promises? I have to say that i’m not that great at promises. I’m a very forgetful person and it’s only gotten worse as we had more kids.

         I think that when we ask for something that is deeply important to us that we plan on giving it back to Him. I mean it’s not ours anyways right? Everything on this earth is on loan to us till we pass away and get our permanent homes in Heaven. I don’t think this means that every time we give it back physically like Hannah did in this verse…but i think it means dedicating it and giving to God the Glory. Like if i prayed for a new job and that job provided for my family then i would make sure that i tithed at my Church so that i could give back to the Lord for answering my prayer. Does this mean that if i do this I’ll get what i want?? NO!! That is not what this is saying.

        When i look at the verse i see that first part and know that she was hurting so bad emotionally, spiritual…that it was causing her PHYSICAL pain! I think this goes back to the verse i did a week or so ago about desires of our hearts. We are free to go to the Lord with our desires of our hearts, we can say to Him “Lord, I’m just so broken up about this right now!! Please Lord see my pain…but Lord I want to follow YOUR will for myself.”  I think when we pray with our whole heart, but also give it completely over to Him that we please God more than anything else.

So all in all this verse taught me a lot about how my fears can keep me from doing something that is i should be doing… but it also means i could be holding my kids back. It showed me that i need to go to God with my whole heart but also i need to make sure i’m ready for that answer of HIS will. I also need to remember my promises to the Lord and give back to Him when He does answer my prayers with a yes.

      I probably could’ve gone into better detail and i might redo this later with a phrase by phrase type deal. But i wanted to try something different this time. 🙂

Thanks for reading!

Frog

Where We Stand..

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      Today i procrastinated a bit… my husband was home sick and spending some quiet time with our toddler just watching cartoons, so i took the opportunity to work on re-painting our living room. I got it about halfway done and felt really proud of myself. Until i realized i was procrastinating to sit down and read my devotional and work on my blog. So i put things away for the day and hopped to it so to speak.

     The devotional for today talked about standing firm in your life. Either it be a Faith thing, work related, home related, friendships, and so on. It made me think of all the times i was wishy washy on where i stood with my faith because i didn’t want to churn the waters and just wanted to keep the peace. It made me think of saying yes to a paint color i really didn’t like just to please my husband and to finally paint….when we are this way it doesn’t turn out well at all! Like with the paint, saying yes to it made me bitter, it wasted money, and it led to arguments and then my husband feeling angry and bitter as well. See… nothing good came out of that…except maybe as an example. Ha!

       Today’s verse is again a short one but i think it’ll be just as good.

verse

“Be on guard. Stand firm in the faith. Be courageous. Be strong.” 1 Corinthians 16:13

      “Be on guard.” I looked up other translations and they had you or your added in to it. It made me think that this isn’t about being on guard for other people but Yourself! When you read it like “Be on YOUR guard”… to me it says that we need to be watching what we are saying, doing, and bringing into our lives. We need to stop a moment and say “this is not healthy for me” or “this is NOT what i believe in and i can not give in to it”.

      “Stand firm in the faith.” This was the almost the same in every translation. I guess no matter how you want to say it it’s that simple. If this is your Faith…then you need to stand firm in it! Don’t be all “well i believe this part of it… but not this part here”.  What does that tell other people? That you don’t trust this thing you believe in. If it was me i wouldn’t want to be a part of something someone isn’t sure they even want to be a part of it.  We need to STAND firm. We have to stand and be sure that this is what we want and model that.

       “Be courageous.”  I think this is telling us to not be afraid again. (like we talked about in the last blog) I could totally see the author standing there like a coach or something saying “Let’s do this! DOn’t be afraid! Fight for that win!” Doesn’t this mean violance? i don’t think so. I think it means that it means standing up and pointing out to a person that what they might be doing is wrong.  Like morally wrong. If you see someone cheating on their marriage, or on a test, or on their taxes. If you see someone physically or verbally abusing someone then lets stand up and be couragous and say “hey! i don’t think that’s right!”

        “Be Strong.”   Could this mean physically? Possibly. But i don’t think that’s what they are going for here. I think they are meaning that we need to be just that…strong but in the spiritual since. We need to work on equipping ourselves for daily onslaughts that might be trying to bring us down. We need to cloth ourselves in that full body spiritual armor. Making sure we are reading His word, understanding it, going to Church, having those close Christian friends that help lift us back up when we feel beat down. It’s making sure we are putting safe and healthy boundaries up for ourselves.  I think this is what it means when it wants us to be “strong”.

     I don’t know about you but i definitely need to work on these areas! Lots of good things to think on and how to put them in place. 🙂

I hope you have enjoyed reading! I’m no professional…but i am a woman just trying to learn more about the Bible and love sharing that with you!

Frog

Paralyzed By Fear..

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    Have you ever been paralyzed with fear? I have been..  Many times as a child, as a young adult, and then later on as a mother.  There are so many things that can paralyze us from going forward… as i have gotten older they seem to get worse and actually stick with me. When i was a kid things like this would stop me in the moment but then the next thing you knew i’d be running around again like nothing happened. I guess because i never really sat down and processed them that it’s catching up to me now.

       What are some of the things that can bring us fear?  For myself I listed mine down and I’ll share them with you.

     My Fears

  • the fear of never truly being loved by my husband
  • Never being seen as beautiful by anyone
  • Never being seen as important
  • never being able to driver long distance again
  • that i will never be able to trust my husband to help me no matter what
  • That God truly does not see me as Important.

 

It’s a pretty intense list… at least to me it is. Specially that last one! Here i am…a Christian, I see myself as a daughter of God and I try to follow His commands. But i still don’t feel like He sees me as Important. I know that until i work through this one none of those others will budge. I know that until I get right with God my every day life is going to be a struggle. Because you can’t say that you follow God and still try to do everything on your own. It just turns into a mess that way.

Today’s verse is about God’s promise to be with us….and more. Let’s go….

verse

“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.
    I have called you by name; you are mine.
When you go through deep waters,
    I will be with you.
When you go through rivers of difficulty,
    you will not drown.
When you walk through the fire of oppression,
    you will not be burned up;
    the flames will not consume you.” Isaiah 43:1b-2 NLT

It’s a bit long but I think all of it is important.

“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you…”  Whenever I see the words “Do not” in the BIble i see the not in all caps. So in the first part the author is telling us to NOT be afraid. Easier said than done right? Then it goes on to say “for i have ransomed you”. Well who ransomed us? You have to look a little bit further back to the beginning of verse 1 to know that this is the Lord speaking. So the Lord is saying HE has ransomed us…. Ok so ransom means that someone gives money or something else of value to get that person or thing back from someone bad. To me this means God has given someone bad (probably Satan) something of great value to make sure HE got us back. 

“…I have called you by name; you are mine.”  To me that first part means that He has called us out, He knows us, not just knows about us…but He knows us personally and intimately. And that last part…”YOU ARE MINE!!” Said with authority, and probably with love as well. There is no doubt what He is wanting to say here.  

When you go through deep waters,  I will be with you.”  I think this means that we don’t have to worry about having too many demands and pressures of the world. Because He will be with us holding us up. 

When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown.”  To mean this means even when things get rough and overwhelming to us He’ll be there again holding us up and making sure to take on the load Himself as well.

When you walk through the fire of oppression,  you will not be burned up…”  Again He’s saying that no matter how much is weighing you down or trying to consume you it will not effect you because He won’t let it. Don’t you you love how when He wants to make sure you get the point He’ll have the author write them down in threes? All three of those lines are saying the same thing but a little different each time to make sure we are paying attention and knowing that HE will be there for us no matter what!

the flames will not consume you.”  Sums it all up right here. Nothing can consume us….no flames…nor worries… nor fears will touch us as long as we are with HIM each day in prayer, trust, reading the Bible, and even our actions. 

This verse is hard for me… I’ll admit it. It’s hard giving up and letting go of the edge of the pool and swim out knowing someone will be there to grab us and help us if we need it. We want to know, we want to control, and we want a certainty….We can’t have that certainty until we let go of those first two i think and I think i’m going to be working on those from now on.

I hope you enjoyed reading this!

Frog

Worries…

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     Worries… we all have them. Some of them turn to anxieties. Some of them cost us trust. Worries can be such a pain to our daily life. So this verse is about them… i don’t have anything else to say about it… i think that covers it nicely. Let’s go for it…

verse

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” 1Peter 5:7 NLT

  Pretty short sweet and to the point right? Well i had heard this verse before but from a different translation and i loved how it was phrased in that so i’ll post that one as well.

 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. KJV 

We’ll use both translations today. Because i think if you just use the one you loose a little bit of emphasis.

So looking at the word “Give” or “Casting” …..I see the word Give as you are Giving something to someone, you’re not going to ask for it back, you’re not showing it to them or borrowing it or so on…. no you are GIVING this over….so it’s going to stay that way.

   So then look at the word Casting….   A guy from my church had an awesome way of putting this. you think of it like fishing you are CASTING the line. You’re not handing it over, you’re not gently putting it out there, and you’re not undecided about it. You’re THROWING that thing out. I love that.

Then you look at the next part. “all your care” or “all your worries and cares”.  Now we know what we are giving up or throwing out. We are not going to hold on to these…we are getting rid of them! Not just once.. i get the distinct feeling the author knows we are going to have to keep doing this over and over until we finally get it right. (just like in casting a fish line)

  Next is “to God” or “unto Him”… So we now know who we are to be giving these over to. God, because who better to give these problems over to then the very Heavenly Father that knows us in and out, knows our fears and struggles better then we do? I think it’s the best person to handle them indeed!

The last part they are both the same but for one word. “for he cares about you” or “for he careth for you”.  It leaves no gaps…He CARES…and because He cares for us that much He wants us to put all of our worries, fears, pain, and so on on to Him and not dwell on them.

As it says in the devotional… what a sweet and wonderful promise that is!  It may be a small verse but it means so much that really you can’t over look this verse. There are many small but mighty verses in the Bible…Though i may not have a long post that day I’m sure…that in the end there will be a great reward in their meaning never the less.

Frog

The Start of Fears…

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   Now this isn’t a post about how Fears starts…nope! This is a post about how i received a cool devotional in the mail yesterday that i had forgotten about. It’s a 30 Day Devotional about FEARS! Woohoo! I mean seriously…this is totally for me! It still amazes me that I went from being a woman with no fears about driving, loving it to pieces really, to a woman that can’t drive past her son’s school about 2 miles away without flipping out. It’s a constant heartache and headache for myself and my family.

So this and some other fears spurred me to buy/donate to get this devotional that i saw on the Proverbs 31 Ministeries’ website. After i wrote yesterday’s post, I knew i wanted to keep going forward but i was floundering for what to write about. Nothing seemed to jump out at me or say “write about me” when i read things. I felt like i was forcing it.

Anyways…then the devotional came and i got hit in the head with an idea of taking the main verse for the devotionals and writing or breaking them down so i could better understand them. 🙂  So that is what I am going to do for the next month or so.  Enjoy!

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I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. 13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” Phillipians 4:12-13

Let’s see…

I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything…”  To me the word “live” is said with an exclamation mark. “I know how to LIVE!” It’s like the author is saying he has found the secret to life… how to make it wonderful no matter what. So you already get a glimpse of what this verse is all about. Then it talk about “on almost nothing”, so this is talking about not having anything, being poor or destitute. To me i think this is telling us that the author understands these problems and is telling us “save it, I’ve been there and experienced that…you can’t tell me that i don’t understand, because i DO”. In other words…Leave your excuses at the door. Ha! 

But then he mentions “or with everything”. So is he trying to say that having everything is not all that it’s cracked up to be? Is he saying that we don’t know how to live when we don’t have to worry? I kinda think he means both of those. There’s that silly saying “More Money, More problems” and i think that fits here….I’ve never seen a truly happy rich person. Have you? If you have please tell me… i’d love to meet them and ask them questions. But i digress, we have two opposite ways of living and the author states he knows how to LIVE (probably meaning how to be thankful) in both of these situations.

I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little.”  Well here he is stating with authority that, yes he does know exactly what to do. But look closely, he doesn’t say he KNOWS, nope he says “i have LEARNED”. To me this means that there was probably a lot of trial and error… probably emphasize that error part. I love how he puts “the secret of living”. I think it’s his way of making us lean in and make sure we don’t miss this next part. 

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”   Well there you go. Right there in black and white is the secret to living. Take a look at the word “through” … he doesn’t say with…but THROUGH Christ. To me, I think this means that as long as we go to God first and don’t expect our way to be done that He will be there and help us. But only if we seek Him and petition HIM before each day. I think it also means we may not always like the answer either…He may tell us to wait or that awful “NO” word….But even if that is the case He’s still going to give us that peace to keep going. 

That last part just helps confirm that. “who gives me STRENGTH”…No matter what, an anxiety attack on the highway, or a lost spouse or child or friend, or a marriage falling a part, or an abusive situation, or just a bad day at work…. NO MATTER WHAT!! He will give us the strength to deal with, to get away from, or to grieve the loss. He’ll be right there shouldering our fears and our pain. He’ll be there even when things are going right..to enjoy and celebrate those as well.

I don’t know about you but reading that and understanding that makes me feel a hundred times better and all warm and gooey inside….like smores….mmmm.  God’s promises are like Smores. I think i might copyright that and slap it on a t-shirt to wear every day! LOL!

 

Hope you enjoyed this!

Frog

Rethinking…But not really

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     I’m a little behind due to the weekend. I was going to do this awesome blog about Esther and some verses that seemed interesting to do. But then I got discouraged. I couldn’t think on how to go forward. I was frustrated and started thinking how this seems to happen a lot. I get going on something really good and then i say to myself “i’m not really any good at this. Maybe i’m giving people false info.. maybe ….” Then i start this crazy spiral.

I think i’m going to take today off as well and then jump back in refreshed and knowing what i want to look deeper at later this week. I think i’m going to sit down and read a few chapters from a book i’ve been studying and write down any verses that stick out to me.  Then i’ll write them out here and then get to breaking them down more.  🙂  I may take Saturdays and Sundays off to focus on family and Blog only during the week.

Thanks for reading my blog and hope you enjoy it! Remember I’m not a professional… i’m just a woman trying to get a better understanding of the Bible and become a self’feeder. In no way are my thoughts concrete…

Frog

 

Fixing It…

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   Hi… my name is Monie and i am a Fixer. I am on zero days of sobriety, I know i have a problem and I admit that. And that is the first step, right?  We all have addictions and they are never a laughing matter especially to the person that struggles with it. (So never think i will make fun of people that go to groups about it, no way!)

Now when I say I’m a Fixer… i don’t mean I’m logical about it. My husband is a very logical Fixer, as in you do this, this, and that and you should be good and it makes sense but you’re more like “no i just need you to listen and not fix it!” But i’m not that kinda Fixer…I’m more of an emotional/Judgemental kinda Fixer. I’ll either tell people it’s ok and do everything for them or i’ll sit back and stare at people and say to myself “well if they had listened to me, they wouldn’t be in this mess.” So i guess in a sense i can be a rescuer or an Ogre. Ha!

It’s hard as I’ve always seen my husband as the Fixer in our relationship but recently I realized after truly looking at my actions…I’m a Fixer too. Being this kinda person can be a Blessing or a curse to people. I think the way I am a Fixer is destructive no matter how you look at it. The more i rescue people the more likely they will not learn from their on mistakes, and the more i sit and judge people the more i scare people off. Also i hurt myself in these actions, I over extend myself in tasks and commitments, or I’ll become bitter and never help anyone…even when they really do need it!

But how can we protect ourselves from becoming this way? I was wondering that and think i found the perfect verse to answer it….

verse

12 Yes, each of us will give a personal account to God. 13 So let’s stop condemning each other. ” Romans 14:12-13

Let’s take a closer look now.

Yes, each of us will give a personal account to God.”   I like how the author starts with the word “YES” To me this is their way of making sure we have no doubt that this is going to happen. It’s not a maybe…it’s not a no… it’s not a “oh well we don’t know what’s going to happen”… NOPE! it’s a very definite YES!  I’m so glad that the Bible is not wishy washy like other writings.  In the next words it says EACH…and PERSONAL. These are red flags to me. To me they say no matter how bad someone treats you YOU are going to have to give the account of YOUR actions…no one else.  

    I think this is a good reminder to make sure we are treating people the way we want to be treated. If that isn’t a good reminder then the last two words are like a knock in the heart. “to God”… not to earthly authorities…not to family members…not to spouses.. or kids.  But to our Lord and Savior are we going to have to give our account to.  I mean i had issues with getting in front of the class, or talking with teachers…how am I going to feel standing in front of God saying “but Lord i did this!” yeah i don’t think that will go over well. Ha!

So let’s stop condemning each other.”  To me this is the author softens a little…i can see them sitting there like a father or mother  to a child and saying in that firm, understanding, but loving  tone “ok hun, but let’s not do this ok?” Or i could totally see this as a tired parent going “you know what? KNOCK IT OFF!” HaHa!! 

Decide instead to live in such a way that you will not cause another believer to stumble and fall.”  So this is telling us we have a choice…”decide”. Even though the author wants us to do right and reminds us about God…we still have a choice.  It reminds me that God is very big on giving us Free Will….We don’t have to follow him…we don’t have to make right choices. He wants us to…He wants us to come to Him and make good choices but it’s still up to us.  

   It goes on to talk about living in a way to not cause another to stumble. So being judgmental or emotional and telling them how to do things would probably be a big stumbling block. We each have our own road to follow. I learned this through another verse:

Accept other believers who are weak in faith, and don’t argue with them about what they think is right or wrong. For instance, one person believes it’s all right to eat anything. But another believer with a sensitive conscience will eat only vegetables. Those who feel free to eat anything must not look down on those who don’t. And those who don’t eat certain foods must not condemn those who do, for God has accepted them.” Romans 14:1-3

   So see we each have our own rules that we need to follow in order to live right. Does this mean we can do whatever we want? Nope… I mean that doesn’t mean go out and murder people, or drive tipsy as you don’t feel convicted to not drink…doing those things are very much wrong! In this i think we need to use a not so common thing anymore called “common Sense”. Ha!  I think we also need to sit down and pray and ask God to show us the things that trip us up so that we can avoid them or set safe guards up to protect ourselves.

   I think this  verse helps me see that I can help people, but in a why they won’t stumble…so if i know someone has an issue with money, or alcohol…i wouldn’t help them by giving them too much money or “rescuing them” in a way that would cause them to fall. It also shows me that by being judgmental i am adding to the things i’m going to have to account for when i see the Lord when i leave this earth. I think for myself just knowing that I’m going to have to stand before HIM will be a great reminder to deal with people in a more gentle way.

I hope you enjoyed reading this!

Frog

Where the Legends Come From…

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     So last night i was trying to find a verse to go over, and i thought hey i’ll do it about children! I mean i have three of them and i’m a stay at home mom so yes children it will be! And as i was looking i was thinking of a great story to go along with it. Then a verse that had the word “children” in it caught my eye and my plan totally changed!

So this verse had another word in it that i had no idea about and so i looked it up. I found a forum that had people showing facts and making up what it could mean to the point i was like literally laughing out loud every time i read a comment. It was hilarious!

Now i wasn’t sure how i would apply this to my life but i just felt like “yes this is the verse i should do”. As i kept thinking about it i thought of movies that were made probably with this verse in mind….I thought about how much it has been twisted to mean something that it doesn’t mean at all. Some of the comments made me want to scream as someone had pointed out and found further in the Bible what it truly did mean but the other person shrugged it off due to wanting it to mean something supernatural.

Ok before i go into it anymore let’s bring out the verse and get to understanding something better. 🙂

verse

   “In those days, and for some time after, giant Nephilites lived on the earth, for whenever the sons of God had intercourse with women, they gave birth to children who became the heroes and famous warriors of ancient times.” (Genesis 6:4)

   So the first part is “In those days, and for some time after, giant Nephilites lived on the earth…”.  So this is the word i had a hard time with, what does Nephilites mean??  So i looked it up…found the forum and learned a whole lot of things. LOL! Now i did learn that i had to jump ahead quite a bit in order to find the true meaning, and the verse that helpd with that was Numbers 13:33 “33 We even saw giants[a] there, the descendants of Anak. Next to them we felt like grasshoppers, and that’s what they thought, too!”  Now in the NLT version it does not have that word but if you go to the NIV version it says “ We saw the Nephilim there (the descendants of Anak come from the Nephilim)”.

    After reading both version we can say that these were a giant people, and were descendants of Anak. Cool. Now i “googled” the word to see if i could find a definition and i did. The meaning of this word in Hebrew is “giant, to oppress”. Well to me this doesn’t sound like such an awesome thing at all.  Then i found someone that had the NLT Study Bible and they shared what it said,  “These “giant Nephilites” were people probably nine or ten feet tall. This same Hebrew term was used to name a tall race of people in Numbers 13:33. Goliath, who was nine feet tall, appears in 1 Samuel 17. The giants used their physical advantage to oppress the people around them.” Still not making them sound awesome but at least a little less scary. Let’s move on…

“..for whenever the sons of God had intercourse with women..”  Now this is where things got silly in the forum. I have to admit that when i first read it through i was even like “what?!” but then i read a little more and slower and for myself realized “sons of God” are NOT angels…but US ! THose of us that call God our Savior and Master, Father and Healer…. THOSE are what was meant by “sons of God”!  In the forum people were going on and on saying that that little phrase right there is talking about how we get half angel and half demon children living among us. Ok people…seriously?  The movies Constantine and The Divinci Code and Greek Mythology are NOT REAL! Ok seriously i do believe Angels are real and i think they really do help out and take on the illusion of human form to help us from time to time…but i think that this whole half breed supernatural stuff is a bunch of hooey that Hollywood wants us to believe in.

     The word “women” bothered me..why was it just “women” almost like they spat it out in distaste…So i again looked around in both NLT version and NIV version. So NIV says “when the sons of God went to the daughters of humans” so this again made me see how people could think the whole half breed thing but then i went further to verse 5 and it read “ The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time.” So every time we do something bad in the Bible we are reference as “son of man” or “women of man” I think that what is being said here is that Righteous men would take any woman, even those that sinned and were considered unclean, and have children with them and that made God very upset.

 “they gave birth to children who became the heroes and famous warriors of ancient times.”  I think this is a reference to what is to come later in the Bible, like Goliath and others… I did a search for “tall” on BibleGateway to see what would come up and found these verses

The Emites used to live there—a people strong and numerous, and as tall as the Anakites. Deuteronomy 2:10

Kish had a son named Saul, as handsome a young man as could be found anywhere in Israel, and he was a head taller than anyone else.  1Samuel 9:2

Go, swift messengers, to a people tall and smooth-skinned, to a people feared far and wide, an aggressive nation of strange speech, whose land is divided by rivers. Isaiah 18:2

So I mean it looks like these people were not completely wiped out when the flood happened, probably Noah or one of his kids’ wives had a shared trait of this so that it lived on. But it does look like they became great warriors and then there were some really awesome men that became heroes that have this trait later on in the Bible.

   I can see why people would think this meant supernatural beings and amazingly gifted people…i could totally see Hollywood taking this verse and making it work to sell their movies about such things and make show after show about it too. Which makes me sad as this isn’t what God was trying to say at all. He was trying to show how awful we had become, taking whatever we wanted and not caring.

At least this is what i got from it….

     As far as how i can apply this to my life…I think what i can take from this is that I need to do things that are pleasing to God, and that being physically tall and strong doesn’t mean that you’re going to succeed in life. I mean look at the words that are used to describe a Nephilite….i don’t want to be that kind of person at all!  So that’s how I’ll apply it to me. 🙂

Hope you enjoyed reading this!

Frog

Broken But Not…

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    As I’ve stated in previous blog posts, my husband and I went through a really difficult time several years ago. We are finally working on it and seems to be working. But there was a time i was just BROKEN!! I cried for days…loudly, quietly…I did so while screaming into my pillow, I shamed him and myself with hateful words and bitter venom. All it did was tear us more a part. I was hurting and i didn’t know how to talk with him anymore.

Well one night as a last ditch effort we went to a group thing called ReEngage…It seemed ok and so we joined and started to work. Then during one of the group session parts they played this song by Casting Crowns called Broken Together. ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhxELo-uD3c ) <this is the official music video for it>  I thought how true this is! The whole song is about being broken and chasing dreams and fairy tale endings but really in the end aren’t we just two broken people trying to make it work?

Then this last month i watched an online study about marriage by Andy Stanley called IMarriage.(you can find it on youtube too)  Wow was it an eye opener! What stayed with me the most was when he said something about how if a desire of our heart is causing us pain and anxiety we need to go to the Lord and say to HIM..”Lord, this desire is important to me. It’s causing me so much pain. I’m giving it to you.” He states at one point that God wants to grant us the desires of our hearts but we need to bring them to him daily and wait on HIS time.

The reason i bring these two things up is because i realized i had desires, I would hint at them or turn them into expectations for my husband to fill up and do.. see the problem? I was bringing them to the wrong person! This led to a lot of brokenness. I still  today have these desires and still feel broken in this area….but it’s different now…i KNOW who to bring it to this time, and it’s the one person who truly knows and understands brokenness!

And with that it brings us to our verse which is about Brokenness. 🙂 see what i did there? LOL!

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   The verse i have today is Galations 2:20 NLT version:

“My old self has been crucified with Christ.[a] It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

Let me start with that first sentence. “My old self has been crucified with Christ…” To me that word crucified really sticks out. To truly understand this word i went back to Luke 22-23 and John 18-19 to read about Jesus’ Crucifixion. If you’re not familiar with those chapters, read over them..it’s very enlightening. SO through that reading i learned how painful that way of dying is. When i hear that my old self or “old way of life” has been “crucified” with Christ…it just tells me that the transition is not going to be fun and games. People might yell at you, make fun of you, bosses may give you a hard time, loved ones may shun you….but this is WITH Christ. He’s done it already…he was ridiculed, beaten, broken, and most of all…loved ones turned their backs on HIM. No one but Jesus could understand the pain we may go through!

“…It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me..” Again I’m drawn to certain words, “no longer I who live” ….wow. Now i don’t think this means who we are dies….no no. We’ll still have those heart desires, we’ll still feel the draw of our passions like music, drawing, numbers, computers…no what i think they are talking about here is all the bad stuff. Our sins of our past, the overwhelming desire to do wrong, the way we used to look at the world or just people that were around us. Once all of that is gone then Christ (Holy Spirit) can come in and be there with us always. Whispering to us when making decisions, lifting us up when we feel like falling, but most of all being there so that we are NEVER truly alone! That makes me feel so much better knowing that I’ll never truly be alone again!

So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God” This here i feel like it is summed up in the last part… trusting in the Son of God….By trusting in Him i will be able to go through life a lot better.

And lastly… “..who loved me and gave himself for me.”  I believe this goes into the common verse of “He loved us so much He gave His one and only Son to die for us.” Not only did God love us so much but Jesus HIMSELF loved us sooooo much that He went through that painful process physically, emotionally, and mentally for US. I mean…who else would do that for me? We say things like “I’d die for you” but do we mean it? Most of the time…NO.

      So in a nut shell… because Christ was crucified I can know that i will have help to live this earthly life until the day He calls me home. Now I know you all are probably wondering what this has to do with my brokenness and marriage i had talked about in the beginning of this. But don’t you see…. if i had had this verse when i was broken and crying, i would’ve know that i wasn’t alone… that Christ knows what my pain feels like and wants to comfort me? Oh how this would’ve saved me so many nights of pain. Oh how this will help me in the future to know that these heart desires are just as important to God as they are to me and that He will be with me through the pain and hurt until the time they may be answered.  Just gotta also remember that my answer may not be 100% what i WANT it to be.

Frog

Getting It Right…

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     This morning i woke in a very bad mood, totally ticked off with my husband. What’s funny is i was mad at him for something that had happened in my dream and he wasn’t guilty of at all. Ha Ha!!  Isn’t it just crazy that even before we open our eyes Satan is already there doing his tricks and making sure we can’t enjoy what God has for us?

So here i was just stewing and getting madder and starting to pick a part everything from last night and setting up what i was going to say and do and all this kinda stuff and then BAM! I see the verse i wrote down last night to do today. And boy do i need to sit down and meditate on this one! So let’s get to it!!

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    The verse for me today is Psalm 86:11….maybe you already know it, it’s one of those “famous verses”, but for those of us that don’t here we go:

“Teach me your ways, O Lord,
    that I may live according to your truth!
Grant me purity of heart,
    so that I may honor you.”

   Ok, don’t know about you guys but seriously just reading it was like a wake up call! It makes me sit up straighter and want to read it over and over again! It makes me feel my heart and soul cry out and say “YES! I want that!!” Let’s break it down though so i don’t miss anything.

“Teach me your ways, O Lord….” I look at this and want to put “your” in all caps! This first part just really nails it in. Put lets look at the context a bit. For this i went back to the two previous verses:

All the nations you made
    will come and bow before you, Lord;
    they will praise your holy name.
 For you are great and perform wonderful deeds.
    You alone are God.”

    For me, with this information i can now know WHY i would want to learn from God! Look at that first part. Nation YOU MADE, will come and BOW before YOU! Here we know that HE made us…with the next two parts we know that we will want to praise HIM. Then lastly that last line tells us that He can do all things and only HIM ALONE can do this.

     Ok back to verse 11. Well with that knowledge we now know the why, If He can do all that, if He made us, then of course we would desire to learn from HIM!

“…so that I can live according to your truth!”  When i read this it gave me a second reason for wanting to learn from Him. If I am learning from God then in my mind it would be a lot easier to live a good and right life. It goes back to yesterday’s verse. As long as we are in HIM, learning, reading, taking the time to soak it all up then everything falls into place spiritually. Does this mean you’ll win the lottery? Or your marriage will be magically fixed? Sadly no. BUT you will have a new way of seeing things. It’ll no longer be up to you solely, you’ll have someone fighting right along with you! Now this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep trying to better yourself…not at all! Keep working on YOU! Only YOU can change YOU! But leave the other person to God. It works out so much better! Trust me… I totally understand!

     Ok I’m starting to ramble again Ha!  Let’s move on to the next part.

“Grant me purity of heart…” Here this tells me that no one has purity of heart….no one. we must ask for it, it must be GRANTED to us! This also tells me that I need this in order to live in His truth and learn from him. That purity of heart if a really be key for us!

And lastly “…so that I may honor You.”  This is important to me…In the end all of this together is to HONOR HIM!  What if we were to read this verse like this:

I honor you, by asking for a pure heart, living according to your truth, and learning your ways!

Look at that! To me doing these three things i bring God so much Honor! Not only do i bring Him honor, but i get to be closer to Him and soak in more knowledge and be prepared to face the day in a whole new light!

    How can i put this in my life today? Well going back to the beginning of this post….instead of letting Satan have my first thoughts this morning, i could’ve sat down and said “God give me a pure heart today! Let my THOUGHTS and WORDS and ACTIONS honor you! Teach me Lord to give these hurts over to YOU as soon as i wake each morning!”  Oh if i had started my day like that, my day would and can bring me so much JOY!

I hope that this may have Blessed you in some way! These are just my thoughts… they don’t make them right, or wrong… they are just my thoughts.

Frog